Note To Self: Remember God's Faithfulness

Looking back on the year 2013 has been bittersweet.  Last Friday morning, I walked around UW and took way too many photos (this photo of the view from Montlake bridge is one of my favorites) while admiring the beauty of God's creation and remembering how beautiful my undergrad campus really is.  I decided to go to one of my favorite quiet places: the sixth floor of the computer science building.  My brother had shown it to me years ago when we were both students at UW.  I rummaged through my backpack for my prayer journal and a pen, and started to write.

"Dear Heavenly Father, 

Thank you for the gifts of quiet mornings and the beauty of your creation.  May all these things always stir my heart to worship you. 

Lord, thank you for all of the ways you showed your faithfulness in 2013."

And so I began jotting down two lists.

First, a list of joys: being in medical school, having chosen the lab in which I will do my PhD research, worship nights, CMDA, finding a home church in Iowa City, going to Urbana missions conference, serving on my first medical mission trip to Haiti, getting to know and be encouraged by three of the undergrad students in a research program over the summer, visiting the headquarters for Wycliffe Bible Translators and Cru, as well as our missionary friends over the summer, going to a women's conference with my mom and ladies from church.

Second, a list of trials: job transitions for my family, my grandma's health, struggles in relationships with others in all areas of life, struggling in school.

"2013 has not been the prettiest of years, but LORD, you have so clearly been with us all the way.  I thank you that you come and stay with us even in the stormiest times of our lives.  You are a kind and gracious God, abounding in love and mercy!  Praise be to Your Name above every other name!  You are good."

Next, I wrote about what the year 2014 would bring.  Already, I know that 2014 will be a year of transitions.  I will be transitioning out of the classroom to taking my first medical licensing exam.  Then I will have to shift gears to clinical rotations for a short while before I go on another medical mission trip and then transition into the lab for research.  I am both excited and a little scared for all of these huge life changes that are coming my way, and all in the span of one year.  But I am reminded of God's faithfulness and goodness in 2013, and that gives me peace.

Philippians 4:4-7 says, "Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice. Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

My prayer for 2014 is that we can rest in God and the hope that we have in Christ Jesus, and that He would be so glorified through our rest, peace, and contentment in Him.

"Lord, you are good, so good! And your mercy endures forever. May every tongue, tribe, and nation praise the name of Jesus! 

In Jesus' Name, 

Amen"

Forgiveness

Luke 6:27-32

I recently finished reading The Hiding Place by Corrie Ten Boom.  She was a Christian Dutch lady who helped protect Jews during the Holocaust and was put in prison and in a concentration camp for it.  If you haven't read her story before, I highly recommend reading this book, because it has challenged me to really examine my faith in Jesus Christ and what it means to fully rely on Him.

One story from when Corrie Ten Boom was traveling and speaking to audiences all over the world, made a particularly large impact on me:

"It was at a church service in Munich that I saw him, the former S.S. man who had stood guard at the shower room door in the processing center at Ravensbruck.  He was the first of our actual jailers that I had seen since that time.  And suddenly it was all there--the roomful of mocking men, the heaps of clothing, Betsie's pain-blanched face.  He came up to me as the church was emptying, beaming and bowing.  "How grateful I am for your message, Fraulein." he said.  "To think that, as you say, He has washed my sins away!"  His hand was thrust out to shake mine.  And I, who had preached so often to the people in Bloemendaal the need to forgive, kept my hand at my side.  Even as angry, vengeful thoughts boiled through me, I saw the sin of them.  Jesus Christ had died for this man; was I going to ask for more?  Lord Jesus, I prayed, forgive me and help me to forgive him.  I tried to smile, I struggled to raise my hand.  I could not.  I felt nothing, not the slightest spark of warmth or charity.  And so again I breathed a silent prayer.  Jesus, I cannot forgive him.  Give Your forgiveness.  As I took his hand the most incredible thing happened.  From my shoulder along my arm and through my hand, a current seemed to pass from me to him, while into my heart sprang a love for this stranger that almost overwhelmed me.  And so I discovered that it is not on our forgiveness any more than on our goodness that the world's healing hinges, but on His.  When He tells us to love our enemies, He gives, along with the command, the love itself."

 This made me think back on the times that I have struggled to forgive others.  How many times have I prayed for God to help me forgive?  It made me think of Matthew 18 when Peter asks Jesus if he should forgive his brother or sister seven times, and Jesus says seven times seventy.  What an impossible task!  Except that God is the one who provides the forgiveness.  It is His grace that we are forgiven, and His grace that we can forgive.

Pray for Haiti

I had the opportunity to go on a medical/dental mission trip to Haiti this past spring break. I learned so much, and got to assist with so many procedures including helping to drain a ganglion cyst, prepatellar bursa, and right facial abscess, as well as helping with patient intake.  But it's funny how the seemingly small things that I experienced on this trip touched my heart the most.

While I was helping with taking patient vitals, I got to serve a lady who was not much older than me.  She was wearing long sleeves and pants, sunglasses, and a hat, even in the 90+ degree weather.  All this to protect her skin as best she could, because she was albino.  Her chief complaint was a large mass on her neck, and an even larger one on her back.  But she was covered with cracks in her skin and suffered much from UV light exposure.  I asked her if she used sunscreen, and my translator looked at me in a quandary.  He did not know what sunscreen was.  So, I wrote down her reasons for wanting to see the doctor, took her blood pressure, and had a look at her neck and back.  There was still a very long line to see one of the doctors, so I asked her if she knew Jesus.  She did, and I told her that I was so glad that she is my sister in Christ.  She smiled, and even with her numerous skin lesions, she was so beautiful.  I later learned from the doctors that she most likely had some type of skin cancer, and there wasn't much that we could do for her medically.  Although her time on earth for this season may be shorter than that of many others, I look forward to the day that we meet again in the presence of God.

Later, I got to shadow one of the doctors, Dr. Tom, while he served the wife of one of the pastors.  She came in and told us that she had diabetes, and to my surprise, Dr. Tom asked her if we could wash her feet.  He took out two disinfectant wipes and together we washed this woman's feet and checked for fungus.  When we found some between her toes, we applied some of the anti-fungal cream and gave her the rest of the tube.  I felt so honored to serve her in this way, washing her feet as Jesus washed his disciples' feet (John 13).

If there is one thing that I have learned from this trip to Haiti, it is the joy of serving the Lord by serving others.  I loved getting to share the gospel with the people there, and to see the joy they had when they heard the Good News of Jesus Christ crucified, dead, buried, resurrected, and taken up to heaven, making the way for our sins to be forgiven so that we can be in a loving relationship with God.  Amidst all of the poverty, illness, destruction from the earthquake, there is so much hope for Haiti because of Jesus.  Please continue to pray for the people Haiti, that they would find hope in Christ and that God would continue to strengthen them and be their all in all.  Thanks!

Urbana 12

16,000 participants at Urbana 12 built
32,000 medical kits for people with
HIV/AIDS in Swaziland, Africa

I was so blessed to be able to attend Urbana 12 conference held in St. Louis, MO with my brother this year.  You can read about his experience on the Business Changing the World track here.

As an MD/PhD student with a heart for missions, I went to this conference hoping for direction as to how God can use someone in my position to share His love with the world.  God was so gracious at this conference, connecting me with other medical students, graduate students and faculty who love Jesus and want Him to be glorified in their interactions, research, and studies in academia.  I also got to attend several graduate school and healthcare missions seminars.

One seminar that I am particularly grateful for was Grad School for God's Global Mission by S. Josh Swamidass, an Assistant Professor in Pathology at Washington University in St. Louis.  It was a huge encouragement to see that God can use grad school as a way to prepare me for the future and as an opportunity to serve God while in school.

Coming from Urbana 12, I have a renewed sense of purpose as I continue my studies (only ~7.5 years to go!).  I am hoping to do medical work and medical research as a mission.  Although I do not know exactly how that will look, I can continue to live out Colossians 3:23-24. I can keep studying hard, serving the people around me, and enjoying my time in school knowing that God is with me, giving me strength and guiding me, so that He may be glorified in and through my life.

Parents' 25th Anniversary Slideshow

We recently celebrated my parents' silver anniversary. It was a beautiful celebration of God's faithfulness to our family and of the love He gave my parents for Himself, for each other, for their family, friends, and everyone they meet. My brother, sister, and I put together this slideshow for my parents.  It features photos of our family and friends, and two original songs. Enjoy!

We Need Your Mercy

I wrote this song at a time when I was struggling with pride, anger, and bitterness, and was frustrated with myself for it.  I wanted to serve God, but all these things were weighing me down. God graciously reminded me of His mercy and how He has set me free from these sins that He may be glorified.  I pray that this song reminds you of the assurance of pardon we have thanks to Jesus, and of the work that God is doing in us, transforming us to become more like Christ.

"Who is God like you, who pardons sin and forgives the transgression of his inheritance?  You do not stay angry forever but delight to show mercy." - Micah 7:18

We Need Your Mercy

Em                                 G

What is this darkness inside my heart?

Am                         C

How do I let go?  Where do I start?

Em                                      G

The sin inside me has taken hold

Am                                          C

I can’t uproot it by strength alone

We seek to love people for Your fame

But are we just seeking to win their praise?

We hurt each other and shame your name

We say we’re Christians but don’t live by grace

Am                     C            G       D

We need Your mercy, Jesus

Am                    C              D

We need Your grace, O Lord

Am                   C              G        D

We need Your love to change us

Am               C         D                      Em

Your glory to be shown among us

Your body broken, Your blood poured out

Your love has spoken but we still doubt

That you could love us, amidst our sin

Help us remember You took our shame

Em                            G                             D

I want to give my life, a living sacrifice

                  Am7             Em

Holy and pleasing to You

Em                             G

But I need Your to refine

                                            D

My heart, my soul, my mind

                Am7                       (D)

Make me new, make me new 2x

Slow Down

I wrote this song while I was driving on the freeway and a car cut me off. I was tired from work and from all the big decisions I needed to make, frustrated at the driver, and about ready to say some angry things. But God was gracious and inspired me to write this song instead. :) I hope that it encourages you to rest in Jesus and trust that He has saved you from sin and that He is in control.

Slow Down by Tiffany Lim

So many times in our lives we get to a point
When we're going a hundred miles an hour
And life is coming at us way too fast
That we forget about the hope that is ours

Don't give up now, before Him bow
Cast your cares on Jesus, and

Slow down, my friend
Take some time to rest in Him
You don't have to strive anymore

When life gets overwhelming lift your eyes up to the King
For He's the One who holds together everything
And you don't have to worry now; our God is in control
And His promises are good forevermore

Don't give up now, before Him bow
Cast your cares on Jesus, and

Slow down, my friend
Take some time to rest in Him
You don't have to strive anymore

For God already loves you
God's already saved you from sin
Jesus Christ has paid the price
He gave His life for us
Be still and believe

"Cast your cares on the LORD
and he will sustain you" - Psalm 55:22a